______________________________________________________________________We are an unaverage American family living on 2.5 acres in Texas with our 5+ homeschooled children and a handful of farm animals. We are taking one day at a time and living under the Lord's grace. May you be blessed as you read and learn more about "our road."
Thursday, September 9, 2010
South Padre 2010
Found My Blog!
You might have thought i lost my blog by the lack of posts, but of course, you all know how busy life can get and things get pushed aside. I just downloaded over 600 pictures from my camera, so i thought i would share what's going on in our lives. Some of them are from before Nathan was born; how the time flies! We had a terrific summer and look forward to a cool, pleasant fall.
We are 2 weeks into our new school year and all is great. I decided to go ahead with My Father's World again this year. We are using Creation to the Greeks, the 2nd year of the 5 year cycle. I am also doing their kindergarten program with Claire and still finishing up the 1st grade phonics with Owen. I am so glad we stuck with MFW. The Bible and history are phenominal (big word!). We have already learned so much in 2 weeks and the conversations we have based on the info are so great. Last weekend, we got to have a Shabbat Dinner Celebration, including homemade Challah bread, and had so much fun. It was the 1st time we've ever used our china, if you can believe it. The kids felt so special! MFW takes all of the thinking and planning out of homeschooling.
Some of the other curriculums we are using right now are:
*Math U See
*Multiplication in Minutes-Rapid Recall System (Little Giant Steps)
*Language Lessons for Little Ones (Queen Homeschool)-Charlotte Mason style but in a writable, workbook format that can be done independently if reading well.
*Italics Handwriting (Getty Dubai)-uses a one stroke method, where possible, which makes transitioning into cursive more natural.
*Various other workbooks for spelling and spanish
*Draw Write Now and God and the History of Art
We also started our new chore system a few weeks ago called Managers of Their Chores by www.titus2.com I can't tell you how amazing it is. It does take a lot of planning and preparation ahead of implementing it, but it is so worth it. The things that used to keep me running all day and overwhelmed at times, are not issues anymore. Everything is scheduled and dished out between everyone in the family. There is little thinking and trying to figure out what is next, because each child has a chore pack that they wear around the house as they do their chores. They just slide out the front card once they complete the job, slip it in the back, and then go on to the next card, until all chores are completed. Big time saver! It has given me more time to focus on school during the day, which takes up a lot of our day now.
Nathan is almost 4 months old now and doing great. He makes having another baby so easy. Or maybe it's that i have so many excellent helpers this time. Either way, we are loving being a family of seven! He is a stout little guy weighing over 15 pounds (at 3 months). He loves all of the faces he sees throughout the day as someone comes by to say hello or pick him up or play with him. He just blends right in with daily life and always blesses with his sweet smiles and unconditional love. Babies are wonderful!
That's all for this update-it's after 1am and i have to sleep sometime! Enjoy all of the pictures below.
We are 2 weeks into our new school year and all is great. I decided to go ahead with My Father's World again this year. We are using Creation to the Greeks, the 2nd year of the 5 year cycle. I am also doing their kindergarten program with Claire and still finishing up the 1st grade phonics with Owen. I am so glad we stuck with MFW. The Bible and history are phenominal (big word!). We have already learned so much in 2 weeks and the conversations we have based on the info are so great. Last weekend, we got to have a Shabbat Dinner Celebration, including homemade Challah bread, and had so much fun. It was the 1st time we've ever used our china, if you can believe it. The kids felt so special! MFW takes all of the thinking and planning out of homeschooling.
Some of the other curriculums we are using right now are:
*Math U See
*Multiplication in Minutes-Rapid Recall System (Little Giant Steps)
*Language Lessons for Little Ones (Queen Homeschool)-Charlotte Mason style but in a writable, workbook format that can be done independently if reading well.
*Italics Handwriting (Getty Dubai)-uses a one stroke method, where possible, which makes transitioning into cursive more natural.
*Various other workbooks for spelling and spanish
*Draw Write Now and God and the History of Art
We also started our new chore system a few weeks ago called Managers of Their Chores by www.titus2.com I can't tell you how amazing it is. It does take a lot of planning and preparation ahead of implementing it, but it is so worth it. The things that used to keep me running all day and overwhelmed at times, are not issues anymore. Everything is scheduled and dished out between everyone in the family. There is little thinking and trying to figure out what is next, because each child has a chore pack that they wear around the house as they do their chores. They just slide out the front card once they complete the job, slip it in the back, and then go on to the next card, until all chores are completed. Big time saver! It has given me more time to focus on school during the day, which takes up a lot of our day now.
Nathan is almost 4 months old now and doing great. He makes having another baby so easy. Or maybe it's that i have so many excellent helpers this time. Either way, we are loving being a family of seven! He is a stout little guy weighing over 15 pounds (at 3 months). He loves all of the faces he sees throughout the day as someone comes by to say hello or pick him up or play with him. He just blends right in with daily life and always blesses with his sweet smiles and unconditional love. Babies are wonderful!
That's all for this update-it's after 1am and i have to sleep sometime! Enjoy all of the pictures below.
The Very First Lesson...
The email I received is titled, "The Very First Lesson in Homeschool" but it really applies to any parent, homeschooling or not. So if you don't homeschool, still read this. At first it seems to only apply to those with little ones, but keep reading. I so enjoyed the reminder to be faithful in training at any age! Posted by Diane from www.lovetolearn.com
Happy Parenting!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The very first lesson in homeschool is not how to write your name or recognize your ABC’s. The very first lesson is obedience, because without it, no other lesson works very well. A child must learn to listen and obey. First time. Without reminders, without excuses, without mom counting to 3!
Most of us still feel like teenagers when our first child is suddenly ready for school! We’re trying very hard to keep the crown of authority in parenthood from slipping right off our head and crashing to the ground. It doesn’t fit very well—we don’t feel adequate for the job. But like it or not, we are in charge of our precious children! God has given us that responsibility and, ready or not, we must grown into the position. Mom, you’re in charge!
Children are in tune to family dynamics. They notice when there is some hesitancy in taking charge of the children. If you don’t feel ready to rule the roost, a child is eager and willing to bump you off your throne and climb up there himself! And that is a very scary home to live in, where family life can be run by a 5-year-old. When Daddy leaves for work, Mom is the sole person in charge, and the children need to feel it. It makes life so much more secure for kids to have very distinct expectations! “For if the trumpet give an uncertain sound, who shall prepare himself to the battle?” (1 Corinthians 14:8)
So, the first lesson of homeschool is the lesson of whose word is law, and who must obey. Teach it well!
I want to assure you that I completely believe in being a benevolent, kind, loving, and compassionate director. But ruler Mom must be, if there is to be peace, order, and learning going on in the home. Mom has to set out the expectations, and teach her children to obey her. If you are a tender mother, this doesn’t come easy. It is more natural to be easy-going, to overlook mild disobedience, and to make excuses for our children (she’s shy, he forgets his manners, he’s a “real boy”, etc.) But just as the little sapling tree grows into a rigid, immovable giant oak, so will your little ones develop habits that are nearly unbreakable by the pre-teen and teenage years. A gentle, insistent and constant nudge in the right direction now will make the man later.
Of course, we want our children to learn academics, but the most important lessons have to do with character training and habits, and learning to control oneself. Be constant in the way you act, Mom. You are modeling what you want your children to act like. Be happy, smile, be a friend—but be in control. Be ultra dependable. Make sure they know that you are not to be meddled with, and that if you say it, it will surely come to pass. Don’t break promises. Better yet, don’t make promises. If you can’t absolutely be certain you are taking them swimming today, don’t promise it. Breaking your word makes your rules less easy to obey (perhaps you’ll change your mind on the rules, too). Create a home environment of trust, security, clear cut rules and consequences. Don’t let the child who whines get their way. Never never let crying, fighting, meanness, impatience or coaxing pay off. Enjoy your children and laugh with them and be their favorite person. Don’t accidentally reward any smidgen of negative behavior (with either your attention, or letting them getting their way). Children sense what is right and fair and they will respect you for not overlooking or brushing off infractions. You must convince them by your lessons and by your own behavior, that good things come to those who behave, and obey Mom and the family rules. When you have done this, not only will they be great students, but they will be good family members that you enjoy being around, and eventually good citizens and emissaries for Christ!
I watched the elephants when I was a young mother, and they influenced me greatly. The elephant mother is quite peaceful and even-tempered. She moves slowly and doesn’t get easily agitated. All goes perfectly well until her baby misbehaves! I watched a movie about elephants walking across the savannah in Africa. They were moving steadily along, in line, with other elephants, when a baby elephant stepped out of the line, wandering the other direction. He only got a couple of steps away, when suddenly, Mother Elephant powerfully reached out with her trunk and slapped the baby back into line. The baby was stunned, but by the time he recovered and looked up, the mother was back to her peaceful steady self. No hard feelings. No lectures. No grudges. No frowns. Just immediate consequences that a baby could easily learn to avoid. I was impressed.
This kind of discipline seemed so healthy to me, that I tried to be that mother elephant for my kids. Mom is happy, smiling, playful, and easy to be with. No nagging. No lectures. No frowning especially! Then when the child moves out of line, she acts swiftly to correct it, never raising her voice, but making perfectly sure that her child knows exactly what is expected and that what he did was not okay. Then immediately, it is back to sunshine, acceptance, love, and a happy mood. No good is done by being in a bad mood, harboring ill feelings, drawing out punishment, or repeating lectures. Children are learning, they are practicing, and we should expect them to push the limits and try out breaking the rules. To see if they really are rules and if the consequences really will happen. That is how they learn. If it never, ever pays to disobey, they will learn more quickly. The children will stop fighting—because you have engineered it so the consequences are just not worth it. They won’t have to be told twice, because they know after you say it once, if they don’t move to action, you’ll be right there, making sure they do just what you asked them to, and there will be consequences. Eventually, all you have to do is just “look” like you are going to get up and they’ll run to obey. My kids laugh about that at my house. If I made a sudden move, the children all would hop to. This has been a very effective way to parent, and to get cooperation in the home.
Every child needs to feel that Mom is their best friend, and always on their side. Wouldn’t life be lonely and frightening without that? I tried to never put enmity between us—it was important for me that my child knew I was always on his side, commiserating with him that he had to live with the consequence of breaking the law. I wanted my children to know that I had to keep the rules too, and that we were hand-in-hand in life, trying to learn to live the rules and not suffer the consequences. I felt bad when he didn’t obey, not mad at him, but sad that he had to live with the consequence, because I truly felt that way. I cried with him. I wanted my child to know that my love extended to compassion for him suffering the consequence of disobedience. I often set the timer, and used the timer as the enemy, rather than me being at odds with my child: “Oh no! Hurry and get ready, it is going to ring and then we won’t be able to play a game before bed! Hurry, hurry–I want to play with you!”
As children learn to obey you, things will run so much more smoothly and more happily. Homeschool will be a pleasure—time you share with your best friends, to learn and do and enjoy together. It will cease to be so much effort or fight to make kids do what they are supposed to. Cooperation turns a job into joy.
Obedience. The most important lesson God wants us to learn here on earth is to obey Him. The very first lesson that children need to learn in the home is to obey you, who God has placed at their head. It makes for a very happy family life.
Happy Parenting!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The very first lesson in homeschool is not how to write your name or recognize your ABC’s. The very first lesson is obedience, because without it, no other lesson works very well. A child must learn to listen and obey. First time. Without reminders, without excuses, without mom counting to 3!
Most of us still feel like teenagers when our first child is suddenly ready for school! We’re trying very hard to keep the crown of authority in parenthood from slipping right off our head and crashing to the ground. It doesn’t fit very well—we don’t feel adequate for the job. But like it or not, we are in charge of our precious children! God has given us that responsibility and, ready or not, we must grown into the position. Mom, you’re in charge!
Children are in tune to family dynamics. They notice when there is some hesitancy in taking charge of the children. If you don’t feel ready to rule the roost, a child is eager and willing to bump you off your throne and climb up there himself! And that is a very scary home to live in, where family life can be run by a 5-year-old. When Daddy leaves for work, Mom is the sole person in charge, and the children need to feel it. It makes life so much more secure for kids to have very distinct expectations! “For if the trumpet give an uncertain sound, who shall prepare himself to the battle?” (1 Corinthians 14:8)
So, the first lesson of homeschool is the lesson of whose word is law, and who must obey. Teach it well!
I want to assure you that I completely believe in being a benevolent, kind, loving, and compassionate director. But ruler Mom must be, if there is to be peace, order, and learning going on in the home. Mom has to set out the expectations, and teach her children to obey her. If you are a tender mother, this doesn’t come easy. It is more natural to be easy-going, to overlook mild disobedience, and to make excuses for our children (she’s shy, he forgets his manners, he’s a “real boy”, etc.) But just as the little sapling tree grows into a rigid, immovable giant oak, so will your little ones develop habits that are nearly unbreakable by the pre-teen and teenage years. A gentle, insistent and constant nudge in the right direction now will make the man later.
Of course, we want our children to learn academics, but the most important lessons have to do with character training and habits, and learning to control oneself. Be constant in the way you act, Mom. You are modeling what you want your children to act like. Be happy, smile, be a friend—but be in control. Be ultra dependable. Make sure they know that you are not to be meddled with, and that if you say it, it will surely come to pass. Don’t break promises. Better yet, don’t make promises. If you can’t absolutely be certain you are taking them swimming today, don’t promise it. Breaking your word makes your rules less easy to obey (perhaps you’ll change your mind on the rules, too). Create a home environment of trust, security, clear cut rules and consequences. Don’t let the child who whines get their way. Never never let crying, fighting, meanness, impatience or coaxing pay off. Enjoy your children and laugh with them and be their favorite person. Don’t accidentally reward any smidgen of negative behavior (with either your attention, or letting them getting their way). Children sense what is right and fair and they will respect you for not overlooking or brushing off infractions. You must convince them by your lessons and by your own behavior, that good things come to those who behave, and obey Mom and the family rules. When you have done this, not only will they be great students, but they will be good family members that you enjoy being around, and eventually good citizens and emissaries for Christ!
I watched the elephants when I was a young mother, and they influenced me greatly. The elephant mother is quite peaceful and even-tempered. She moves slowly and doesn’t get easily agitated. All goes perfectly well until her baby misbehaves! I watched a movie about elephants walking across the savannah in Africa. They were moving steadily along, in line, with other elephants, when a baby elephant stepped out of the line, wandering the other direction. He only got a couple of steps away, when suddenly, Mother Elephant powerfully reached out with her trunk and slapped the baby back into line. The baby was stunned, but by the time he recovered and looked up, the mother was back to her peaceful steady self. No hard feelings. No lectures. No grudges. No frowns. Just immediate consequences that a baby could easily learn to avoid. I was impressed.
This kind of discipline seemed so healthy to me, that I tried to be that mother elephant for my kids. Mom is happy, smiling, playful, and easy to be with. No nagging. No lectures. No frowning especially! Then when the child moves out of line, she acts swiftly to correct it, never raising her voice, but making perfectly sure that her child knows exactly what is expected and that what he did was not okay. Then immediately, it is back to sunshine, acceptance, love, and a happy mood. No good is done by being in a bad mood, harboring ill feelings, drawing out punishment, or repeating lectures. Children are learning, they are practicing, and we should expect them to push the limits and try out breaking the rules. To see if they really are rules and if the consequences really will happen. That is how they learn. If it never, ever pays to disobey, they will learn more quickly. The children will stop fighting—because you have engineered it so the consequences are just not worth it. They won’t have to be told twice, because they know after you say it once, if they don’t move to action, you’ll be right there, making sure they do just what you asked them to, and there will be consequences. Eventually, all you have to do is just “look” like you are going to get up and they’ll run to obey. My kids laugh about that at my house. If I made a sudden move, the children all would hop to. This has been a very effective way to parent, and to get cooperation in the home.
Every child needs to feel that Mom is their best friend, and always on their side. Wouldn’t life be lonely and frightening without that? I tried to never put enmity between us—it was important for me that my child knew I was always on his side, commiserating with him that he had to live with the consequence of breaking the law. I wanted my children to know that I had to keep the rules too, and that we were hand-in-hand in life, trying to learn to live the rules and not suffer the consequences. I felt bad when he didn’t obey, not mad at him, but sad that he had to live with the consequence, because I truly felt that way. I cried with him. I wanted my child to know that my love extended to compassion for him suffering the consequence of disobedience. I often set the timer, and used the timer as the enemy, rather than me being at odds with my child: “Oh no! Hurry and get ready, it is going to ring and then we won’t be able to play a game before bed! Hurry, hurry–I want to play with you!”
As children learn to obey you, things will run so much more smoothly and more happily. Homeschool will be a pleasure—time you share with your best friends, to learn and do and enjoy together. It will cease to be so much effort or fight to make kids do what they are supposed to. Cooperation turns a job into joy.
Obedience. The most important lesson God wants us to learn here on earth is to obey Him. The very first lesson that children need to learn in the home is to obey you, who God has placed at their head. It makes for a very happy family life.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Thursday, May 20, 2010
New Baby
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Baby Update
I know i've been sparse lately on my blog but a lot is going on and will get even busier soon! I am 38 weeks tomorrow and feel huge, although everyone but my hubbie, assures me i'm not that big. He looks at me every day and says, "Wow, you're huge!" Either way, i am full o' baby and feel ready to pop, hopefully soon. 2 of my babies have come a couple of weeks early and the other 2 were about 4 days early, so this one is a toss up, could be tomorrow or in 2 + more weeks?? We are very excited to know if this one is a boy or girl. Our house is still divided-the guys say boy, and girls say girl???
My midwife recently discovered that i was very anemic, so i have spent the last 2 weeks loading up on lots of alfalfa, iron, yellow dock, spirulina, molasses, etc, etc. We are hoping that these supplements will bring my hemoglobin up enough to not have issues at the birth. Thanks for all of you who have been praying for us. I should get lab results back tomorrow to find out if it's all been helping. In addition, i have had more than normal (for end of pregnancy) fatigue and lack of energy which has required lots of extra sleeping and resting. My children have been very understanding and for the most part have handled it well, except Kate, poor baby, lots of crying and getting upset. I guess it is a precursor to her adjustment of a new member of the family. Maybe we'll get all of this out of the way now, instead of after?
We've also had fun being photographed lately by a friend who is starting a photography business. Her business name is Wrapped in Light and you can see more pics here on her flickr page. She also hand dyes yarn, as you will see pics of too. I've loved getting some great, unique pictures of our family and my belly. I'll be posting more of her photos later.
So, we are here, just finishing up last minute details, getting our summer homeschool schedule going, and waiting.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Rare Snow 2010
These pics were taken back in February when we had a rare snow fall. Everyone had a great time, especially Daddy!
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Tabernacle Exerience
For those in our area, you may consider going to this week. I hope to make it there one morning. Sounds really neat! I have heard that it's $5 for adults and kids are free?? Call them to confirm.
From the website: http://www.tabernacleexperience.com/
Just as the original Tabernacle moved from town to town in the days of the Old Testament - our life-size replica travels across the United States, impacting communities and churches from California to North Carolina.Your church can host this interactive spiritual journey - which allows each visitor to feel as though they have walked through the real Tabernacle of Moses.
April 17-25, 2010
9:00 a.m - 8:00 p.m.
Sanctuary of Praise
'save our streets'
@1700 Groesbeck
Bryan, Texas 77803
Contact:Michael Alaniz
(979) 822.1590
From the website: http://www.tabernacleexperience.com/
Just as the original Tabernacle moved from town to town in the days of the Old Testament - our life-size replica travels across the United States, impacting communities and churches from California to North Carolina.Your church can host this interactive spiritual journey - which allows each visitor to feel as though they have walked through the real Tabernacle of Moses.
April 17-25, 2010
9:00 a.m - 8:00 p.m.
Sanctuary of Praise
'save our streets'
@1700 Groesbeck
Bryan, Texas 77803
Contact:Michael Alaniz
(979) 822.1590
Friday, April 16, 2010
Bluebonnets 2010
Here in Texas we are blessed with beautiful Spring wildflowers. What better way to enjoy them than putting your own beauties in the middle of them and taking pictures. Here's a rare 35 week belly pic too. It's nice to have children old enough to take pictures of Mama every once in a while ; )
Friday, April 2, 2010
Formula For Happy Kids!
Great parenting advice! Something I need to be reminded of often.~g
Posted by Diane from www.lovetolearn.com
I just had my dinner date dampened. My husband took me out to my favorite Chinese restaurant, where we were sitting enjoying our meal when a mother with a little boy and a baby entered the restaurant. She had a friend with her and no sooner had they been seated did the drama began:
“Sit down, Tommy! Sit down right now! If you don’t sit down, I am going to put you in a highchair!” Although she was across the restaurant from our table, she was loud enough that I couldn’t ignore what was happening. Tommy continued to jump on the booth seat, next to his mother’s friend, while his mother scowled at him. I wondered if the friend was going to enjoy her dinner.
“Tommy, I told you to stop jumping. Tommy, TOMMY! Stop jumping and sit down right now or you aren’t going to get any food.”
“Tommy, TOMMY! You sit down right now or I won’t let you get a soda.” I have not seen the mother smile yet.
“Tommy, you need to sit down right now. . .stop jumping! if I have to tell you again, you’ll be sitting in the car.”
. . . . TOMMY!
Well, I won’t torture you any longer. It was not a pleasant thing to observe. I told my husband I needed to blog. Poor friend who is along for the miserable evening. I feel sorry for her. Poor mother! Life isn’t very fun for her. She’ll get “frown lines” while she is still young. But, most of all, POOR, poor child being nagged to death. I don’t want to see the future, when he is 13 and twice her strength. It won’t be a pretty sight.
With Ammon turning 19 this year, we’ve got 6 of our kids launched, and just one left to go. My 7th, Louisa, is just 14 years old . . . I can finally begin to see the finish line of child raising off in the distance. Parenting is the most difficult, overwhelming, monumental challenge I’ve faced in life. And the most thrilling, joyous, and meaningful one too! We struggle to learn, we do our best, and we hope and pray it will be enough. It is a huge job to raise a family. When they are all grown, I will miss having a house full of life, full of kids!
When I was pregnant with my first baby, I was a senior in college at a big university. I was used to research, so I began the confusing and conflicting study of child discipline. After several months of serious study, one day I began to sob amidst my stacks of books. This was not like math, where formulas always gave consistent results. This study was full of conflicting opinions. For every theory, there was an opposite theory, just as firmly supported. One said “spank”. The other said “don’t spank”. One said “structure”. The other said “flow with it”. The family scientists were all of differing opinions. They all had research and data, but how to interpret that information was a mystery. When I asked friends, their opinions were all over the board. That’s when I began my occupation as a desperate praying mother. You get more results that way!
There’s a million things learned by parenting. I think most of it is for the parents’ benefit and training, as much as for the children. What does it take to be a good parent? If I could put it in a nutshell, though, here is what I think is most important:
1. Be playful!
2. Be trustworthy!
3. Take charge!
Be Playful!Everyone craves fun! Playfulness is a most delightful trait in a parent. I think parents get too scowly, too serious, too boring. Smile and be affectionate. Laugh a lot! If you are playful, you’ll get lots more cooperation. It is so much more fun to do chores to bouncy music or have races to see who can finish this or that first. Silly things are so delightful to children: like coming to breakfast with a wig on! Or spontaneous things like suddenly deciding to jump in the car and take off on an outing with 5 minutes notice.
Why not? Being playful makes kids see you as a happy companion, rather than a finger-shaking grouch.
Be Trustworthy!Be trustworthy. Kids are dependent on us for everything and being dependable is basic to their well-being. Make sure meals are on time, be there to pick them up on time—do what you say you will do. This alone creates security in a child. So much of life is unpredictable, but if you are trustworthy, your child will be stable.
I once was in a carpool with a mother who just didn’t show up to pick the kids up on time. These were teens in a play practice that got out at 9 PM. It was dark outside and the theater locked its doors and everyone went home after the practice, leaving our girls standing on the curb waiting, waiting, waiting. It didn’t take me long to realize that carpool wasn’t going to work, but I finally understood the very nervous, flighty jumpiness that the children in that family exhibited. They just couldn’t depend on their mother, good person though she was. And that non-trustworthiness shook their foundation.
Being dependable starts when a child is newly born. They need to learn that you will help them cope with life—that they will be fed, cared for, comforted, and that their own needs will not overwhelm them, but will be met by you, their loving parent. As they grow, trustworthiness means you will always, always, ALWAYS do what you say you will. If you say you will not let them have dessert until they have eaten their food, or that they have to sit in the high chair, or that they have to wear a coat outside, or that they must come first time you call, you had better mean it. Because every time you break your own word, you lose respect in your child’s eyes. They learn that you lie, that you say things that you don’t really mean, and that therefore, you can’t truly be trusted.
As my parenting years increased, I ended up making few edicts because I knew I had to follow through and make it happen. Eventually I learned by hard experience not to be a liar, and tried to carefully calculate what I said, and only lay down the law on the things truly worth battling over. I was far from a perfect parent, but I did learn that the more trustworthy we can be in following through on our word, the happier and more secure our children will be.
Take Charge!There is no more insecure feeling that to realize you are on a plane without a pilot, or in an army without a general, or worst of all, in a family without a parent in command. Take charge! Children need it so much. The waffling, softy parent is scary to me. Because I was one—once—and I saw the damage it did.
Seeing that, my main task in raising little ones was to teach them first-time obedience to me. We practiced it together, rewarded them for it, drilled it, and told stories about it. God expects our obedience. Parents stand in the place of God to their very young children, leading them to God. How can children ever learn to respect a heavenly parent if you have not taught them to respect and obey their earthly parent?
If you say it is time to put your pajamas on, make sure it happens. Don’t repeat your command. Don’t beg and nag and negotiate. Be non-negotiable! If mommy says it is time to put on your pajamas, the kids better know that she’ll be behind that, following up on it, making it happen and ready to counter any resistance. So, Mom, that means you better be willing to do that before making any idle requests. And you can’t say it twice without weakening your authority—so get eye-contact, get their attention before you make a command. And be prepared to “check their work” right away and make sure it is done, even if you have to dress them yourself.
This may not feel like you are being “nice”, but it is much, much nicer for a child to be secure, to know that mom is in charge, to know that she is trustworthy and dependable and unyielding. It makes life a safe place. Kids should not be able to direct the affairs of the family by their whining, tantrums or refusing to obey. If a child feels like they have their hands on the steering wheel, no one feels safe that the family car is not going to careen off a cliff!
Especially, don’t forget the playful part. Promise some fun—”I’ll start a story in 5 minutes and you’ll get to choose it if you are here with your pajamas on!” Be happy, smile and show lots of affection. Be tender. But once you have said it, don’t let 5 minutes pass without getting up off the sofa and seeing to it that you are obeyed.
The formula: if Mom=a playful, trustworthy, authority figure, then childhood= a safe, secure and happy time + children grow to = emotionally healthy, happy adults.
That’s the formula I believe works for raising good kids. Best success!
Posted by Diane from www.lovetolearn.com
I just had my dinner date dampened. My husband took me out to my favorite Chinese restaurant, where we were sitting enjoying our meal when a mother with a little boy and a baby entered the restaurant. She had a friend with her and no sooner had they been seated did the drama began:
“Sit down, Tommy! Sit down right now! If you don’t sit down, I am going to put you in a highchair!” Although she was across the restaurant from our table, she was loud enough that I couldn’t ignore what was happening. Tommy continued to jump on the booth seat, next to his mother’s friend, while his mother scowled at him. I wondered if the friend was going to enjoy her dinner.
“Tommy, I told you to stop jumping. Tommy, TOMMY! Stop jumping and sit down right now or you aren’t going to get any food.”
“Tommy, TOMMY! You sit down right now or I won’t let you get a soda.” I have not seen the mother smile yet.
“Tommy, you need to sit down right now. . .stop jumping! if I have to tell you again, you’ll be sitting in the car.”
. . . . TOMMY!
Well, I won’t torture you any longer. It was not a pleasant thing to observe. I told my husband I needed to blog. Poor friend who is along for the miserable evening. I feel sorry for her. Poor mother! Life isn’t very fun for her. She’ll get “frown lines” while she is still young. But, most of all, POOR, poor child being nagged to death. I don’t want to see the future, when he is 13 and twice her strength. It won’t be a pretty sight.
With Ammon turning 19 this year, we’ve got 6 of our kids launched, and just one left to go. My 7th, Louisa, is just 14 years old . . . I can finally begin to see the finish line of child raising off in the distance. Parenting is the most difficult, overwhelming, monumental challenge I’ve faced in life. And the most thrilling, joyous, and meaningful one too! We struggle to learn, we do our best, and we hope and pray it will be enough. It is a huge job to raise a family. When they are all grown, I will miss having a house full of life, full of kids!
When I was pregnant with my first baby, I was a senior in college at a big university. I was used to research, so I began the confusing and conflicting study of child discipline. After several months of serious study, one day I began to sob amidst my stacks of books. This was not like math, where formulas always gave consistent results. This study was full of conflicting opinions. For every theory, there was an opposite theory, just as firmly supported. One said “spank”. The other said “don’t spank”. One said “structure”. The other said “flow with it”. The family scientists were all of differing opinions. They all had research and data, but how to interpret that information was a mystery. When I asked friends, their opinions were all over the board. That’s when I began my occupation as a desperate praying mother. You get more results that way!
There’s a million things learned by parenting. I think most of it is for the parents’ benefit and training, as much as for the children. What does it take to be a good parent? If I could put it in a nutshell, though, here is what I think is most important:
1. Be playful!
2. Be trustworthy!
3. Take charge!
Be Playful!Everyone craves fun! Playfulness is a most delightful trait in a parent. I think parents get too scowly, too serious, too boring. Smile and be affectionate. Laugh a lot! If you are playful, you’ll get lots more cooperation. It is so much more fun to do chores to bouncy music or have races to see who can finish this or that first. Silly things are so delightful to children: like coming to breakfast with a wig on! Or spontaneous things like suddenly deciding to jump in the car and take off on an outing with 5 minutes notice.
Why not? Being playful makes kids see you as a happy companion, rather than a finger-shaking grouch.
Be Trustworthy!Be trustworthy. Kids are dependent on us for everything and being dependable is basic to their well-being. Make sure meals are on time, be there to pick them up on time—do what you say you will do. This alone creates security in a child. So much of life is unpredictable, but if you are trustworthy, your child will be stable.
I once was in a carpool with a mother who just didn’t show up to pick the kids up on time. These were teens in a play practice that got out at 9 PM. It was dark outside and the theater locked its doors and everyone went home after the practice, leaving our girls standing on the curb waiting, waiting, waiting. It didn’t take me long to realize that carpool wasn’t going to work, but I finally understood the very nervous, flighty jumpiness that the children in that family exhibited. They just couldn’t depend on their mother, good person though she was. And that non-trustworthiness shook their foundation.
Being dependable starts when a child is newly born. They need to learn that you will help them cope with life—that they will be fed, cared for, comforted, and that their own needs will not overwhelm them, but will be met by you, their loving parent. As they grow, trustworthiness means you will always, always, ALWAYS do what you say you will. If you say you will not let them have dessert until they have eaten their food, or that they have to sit in the high chair, or that they have to wear a coat outside, or that they must come first time you call, you had better mean it. Because every time you break your own word, you lose respect in your child’s eyes. They learn that you lie, that you say things that you don’t really mean, and that therefore, you can’t truly be trusted.
As my parenting years increased, I ended up making few edicts because I knew I had to follow through and make it happen. Eventually I learned by hard experience not to be a liar, and tried to carefully calculate what I said, and only lay down the law on the things truly worth battling over. I was far from a perfect parent, but I did learn that the more trustworthy we can be in following through on our word, the happier and more secure our children will be.
Take Charge!There is no more insecure feeling that to realize you are on a plane without a pilot, or in an army without a general, or worst of all, in a family without a parent in command. Take charge! Children need it so much. The waffling, softy parent is scary to me. Because I was one—once—and I saw the damage it did.
Seeing that, my main task in raising little ones was to teach them first-time obedience to me. We practiced it together, rewarded them for it, drilled it, and told stories about it. God expects our obedience. Parents stand in the place of God to their very young children, leading them to God. How can children ever learn to respect a heavenly parent if you have not taught them to respect and obey their earthly parent?
If you say it is time to put your pajamas on, make sure it happens. Don’t repeat your command. Don’t beg and nag and negotiate. Be non-negotiable! If mommy says it is time to put on your pajamas, the kids better know that she’ll be behind that, following up on it, making it happen and ready to counter any resistance. So, Mom, that means you better be willing to do that before making any idle requests. And you can’t say it twice without weakening your authority—so get eye-contact, get their attention before you make a command. And be prepared to “check their work” right away and make sure it is done, even if you have to dress them yourself.
This may not feel like you are being “nice”, but it is much, much nicer for a child to be secure, to know that mom is in charge, to know that she is trustworthy and dependable and unyielding. It makes life a safe place. Kids should not be able to direct the affairs of the family by their whining, tantrums or refusing to obey. If a child feels like they have their hands on the steering wheel, no one feels safe that the family car is not going to careen off a cliff!
Especially, don’t forget the playful part. Promise some fun—”I’ll start a story in 5 minutes and you’ll get to choose it if you are here with your pajamas on!” Be happy, smile and show lots of affection. Be tender. But once you have said it, don’t let 5 minutes pass without getting up off the sofa and seeing to it that you are obeyed.
The formula: if Mom=a playful, trustworthy, authority figure, then childhood= a safe, secure and happy time + children grow to = emotionally healthy, happy adults.
That’s the formula I believe works for raising good kids. Best success!
Thursday, April 1, 2010
A New Day
Yesterday I posted an article about the mother's attitude influencing the mood of her family. So i decided that today, no matter how i felt, I would choose to have a good attitude. I actually got less sleep than normal last night and today was a terrific day. Since i wasn't complaining about how tired i was, my children weren't complaining either. Since i didn't whine about how much they whined, they didn't whine. Since i didn't talk ugly to them, they didn't talk ugly to each other. Amazing, I mean really amazing! Sometimes i just need to be knocked in the head and reminded of things i already know. I smiled more, loved on my children more, and felt happier all because i chose to ignore my own bad attitude and be more joyful. How simple yet revolutionary!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Dispelling Gloom
Just what I needed to hear. It seems that most of our days are like this lately. I have entered the very tired phase of pregnancy (gettin' older!) and my attitude has rubbed off on my children. It seems like all that goes on at our house is fighting, complaining, and whining. Thanks to this post by Diane of www.lovetolearn.com I am reminded that my attitude, whether gloomy or happy, affects my whole family! What conviction.~g
It was one of those days. The sun never came out. It was cloudy, cold and gray, with the foreboding of a storm. The baby was pulling at her ears and crying—sick again. The little ones squabbled over every imaginable injustice. Homeschool was far from “homey”. I was without a car, but with a long list of errands that had to be done. My scripture study and planning time had to be set aside, as the baby wouldn’t nap but wanted to be held. Laundry was backing up so badly that everyone was wondering if they’d have clean clothes tomorrow. I could go on, telling you my woes. Bleak, very bleak.
Things could have gone from bad to worse, but I had one of those rare experiences in which I saw in glaring reality that we create our own happiness by our attitude. As dinner time approached, I had even more to gripe about, but I put on some fun, lively music and involved the children in work. We cleaned up the living room, set the table, and did chores that had never been finished in the morning’s awful gloom. No one was smiling or eager, yet. But I sang along to the music and rallied the children to make a super dinner. We peeled apples and made an apple crisp. Then we dove into making casseroles. We set the table with fancy goblets. The children took turns rocking the baby in the midst of the busy preparations with the upbeat music playing.
By the time Daddy and my teenage boys came home from work late (of course, it always happens on those days!), the dining room was bright and full of delicious smells. Immediately they picked up on the happy spirit and willingly helped with the final meal preparations. We enjoyed being together and no one even complained that the dinner was over an hour late.
A small thing. How different it could have been. I felt I had plenty of reason to complain.
Most wives and mothers come to learn before too long that their attitude is contagious. I have often wanted to moan, “Can’t I just have a bad day without everyone else borrowing it?”. It seems that the family members pick up on mother’s attitude and transfer it into their own personal feelings about the day. If I am overworked, my husband feels he has worked far too hard too. If I am too tired to make dinner, every other member of my family seems to be exhausted! I can’t even sit down during chore time without finding myself surrounded by others who just need to “sit down a minute!”. And so it is with having a happy countenance. It passes on to each child and to our husbands like wildfire. Even a conscious effort can’t prevent it from transferring!
The woman is the center of the home, just as the hub of a wheel. She cannot have a bad day without influencing the whole family. And just the same, her cheerfulness or enthusiasm spreads quickly through the family.
How long and how much effort does it take to turn and look your loved ones in the eye and smile when they come home? Such a little thing. How much energy does it take to for a moment look at their sweet faces and say something positive to your little ones? What a pittance of a price. What keeps us from doing these things? Preoccupation? Laziness? What?
Victor Hugo, in his novel, Toilers of the Sea, speaks of the heroine Deruchette: “Her presence lights the home; her approach is like a cheerful warmth; she passes by, and we are content; she stays awhile and we are happy. Is it not a thing of divine, to have a smile which, none know how, has the power to lighten the weight of that enormous chain that all the living in common drag behind them? Deruchette possessed this smile; we may say that this smile was Deruchette herself.”
Later, he philosophizes: “There is in this world no function more important than that of being charming—to shed joy around, to cast light upon dark days, to be the golden thread of our destiny and the very spirit of grace and harmony. Is not this to render a service?”I believe there can be no more important job than to cast cheer on dark days, spreading sunshine, and lifting those who live with you, and who work with you. It seems a small thing, but those moments add to make up a lifetime, and an eternity. A happy attitude draws others like a magnet. They enjoy the feeling. They long to be around it. Mothers, we have so much influence and power to dispel gloom!
(Written years ago, when my children were younger. It still works the same way!)
It was one of those days. The sun never came out. It was cloudy, cold and gray, with the foreboding of a storm. The baby was pulling at her ears and crying—sick again. The little ones squabbled over every imaginable injustice. Homeschool was far from “homey”. I was without a car, but with a long list of errands that had to be done. My scripture study and planning time had to be set aside, as the baby wouldn’t nap but wanted to be held. Laundry was backing up so badly that everyone was wondering if they’d have clean clothes tomorrow. I could go on, telling you my woes. Bleak, very bleak.
Things could have gone from bad to worse, but I had one of those rare experiences in which I saw in glaring reality that we create our own happiness by our attitude. As dinner time approached, I had even more to gripe about, but I put on some fun, lively music and involved the children in work. We cleaned up the living room, set the table, and did chores that had never been finished in the morning’s awful gloom. No one was smiling or eager, yet. But I sang along to the music and rallied the children to make a super dinner. We peeled apples and made an apple crisp. Then we dove into making casseroles. We set the table with fancy goblets. The children took turns rocking the baby in the midst of the busy preparations with the upbeat music playing.
By the time Daddy and my teenage boys came home from work late (of course, it always happens on those days!), the dining room was bright and full of delicious smells. Immediately they picked up on the happy spirit and willingly helped with the final meal preparations. We enjoyed being together and no one even complained that the dinner was over an hour late.
A small thing. How different it could have been. I felt I had plenty of reason to complain.
Most wives and mothers come to learn before too long that their attitude is contagious. I have often wanted to moan, “Can’t I just have a bad day without everyone else borrowing it?”. It seems that the family members pick up on mother’s attitude and transfer it into their own personal feelings about the day. If I am overworked, my husband feels he has worked far too hard too. If I am too tired to make dinner, every other member of my family seems to be exhausted! I can’t even sit down during chore time without finding myself surrounded by others who just need to “sit down a minute!”. And so it is with having a happy countenance. It passes on to each child and to our husbands like wildfire. Even a conscious effort can’t prevent it from transferring!
The woman is the center of the home, just as the hub of a wheel. She cannot have a bad day without influencing the whole family. And just the same, her cheerfulness or enthusiasm spreads quickly through the family.
How long and how much effort does it take to turn and look your loved ones in the eye and smile when they come home? Such a little thing. How much energy does it take to for a moment look at their sweet faces and say something positive to your little ones? What a pittance of a price. What keeps us from doing these things? Preoccupation? Laziness? What?
Victor Hugo, in his novel, Toilers of the Sea, speaks of the heroine Deruchette: “Her presence lights the home; her approach is like a cheerful warmth; she passes by, and we are content; she stays awhile and we are happy. Is it not a thing of divine, to have a smile which, none know how, has the power to lighten the weight of that enormous chain that all the living in common drag behind them? Deruchette possessed this smile; we may say that this smile was Deruchette herself.”
Later, he philosophizes: “There is in this world no function more important than that of being charming—to shed joy around, to cast light upon dark days, to be the golden thread of our destiny and the very spirit of grace and harmony. Is not this to render a service?”I believe there can be no more important job than to cast cheer on dark days, spreading sunshine, and lifting those who live with you, and who work with you. It seems a small thing, but those moments add to make up a lifetime, and an eternity. A happy attitude draws others like a magnet. They enjoy the feeling. They long to be around it. Mothers, we have so much influence and power to dispel gloom!
(Written years ago, when my children were younger. It still works the same way!)
Monday, March 1, 2010
Pink or Blue?
For our fifth baby, my hubbie graciously allowed me to do something we hadn't done up to this point-find out the baby's gender. I've always been fine with not knowing but this time i thought it would be fun to be able to plan ahead.
So, I went to have a 3D ultrasound a couple of weeks ago with the whole family in tow. The baby had his/her feet crossed and tucked up in the exact spot we needed to see. After 45 minutes, the techs said they would go with girl because they didn't "see anything," but ended with "call us when you have the baby so will know if we were right or wrong." Not good enough for me to go forward with all pink.
2 weeks later, due to a technicality error on their part, i got to do another 3D ultrasound, this time my mom came. The baby had his/her feet crossed again but out straight this time. Again, not enough to be certain, but because the tech didn't "see anything" she said she was sticking with girl.
When i got home and replayed the video of the ultrasound, everyone who watched it was adamant that they saw boy parts. I could see what they were talking about but the tech convinced me it was a girl. Now I don't know.
So much for my lofty plans to make bedding, embroidered name burp rags, diaper bags, diapers, blankets,etc. in only pink or blue. What i have decided to do is just be ready for both, again, just as i have with the other ones. Better safe than sorry. If we decide on names ahead of the birth, i will go ahead and embroider stuff with a boy and girl name. I already have some items made for a boy and am working on lavender and blue diaper bags.
I think this will be our most anticipated birth in that we are split 50/50. The boys all think it's a boy and the girls all say it's a girl. We can't wait to see what this little person is; either way he/she will melt all of our hearts as soon as we see and hold him/her. God knows what we need and will give us accordingly.
I was recently reminded of something i heard a long time ago and it made sense. The question was why doesn't God allow us to see our babies as they are developing inside of us like a kangaroo can. If only we could just take a peek and see how things were going. The answer was that God knew we as women would want to "help" our babies along as we thought best, so He had to hide them so He could do His work and us not mess it up. It falls under the realm of one of God's great mysteries. Obviously, it was not God's will for us to know what the gender of this baby is and we will just have to wait, but it is fun to guess!
So, what's your take on Baby Davis #5. Post a comment and let us know.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
Fall Family Pics
Sorry so many picture posts at once, i'm catching up on months of pictures. I made the dresses the girls are wearing. Very simple- the same idea as a skirt with elastic but make it longer and add ribbon for straps-that's it.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Fall 2009 & Winter 2010 Pics
Here are some pictures from the past few months. Lots going on, everyone growing and changing as you can see. Highlights: Kate is potty trained!, the chickens are finally laying eggs, about 3-5 a day (should pick up in the spring), Claire can ride a bike without training wheels, Owen is finally a real cub scout, we had our biggest garden harvest in December when we pulled out everything the night of the first freeze, and of course, we are patiently awaiting the birth of our newest family member in May!
Monday, January 25, 2010
Smelling Good or Bad?
by Nancy Campbell-Above Rubies
Ephesians 5:26, "Christ loved the church, and gave himself for it; that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the Word, that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish."
Back many years ago when folks did not have the plumbing in their homes that we enjoy today, most families took a bath once a week. Even when I was a child we bathed once a week, usually Saturday evening, to prepare for Sunday. But, we were challenged to have a Quiet Time every day where we read the Word of God to cleanse our inward lives.
Today, times have changed. Now that we have showers, everyone enjoys a shower every day to cleanse their bodies, but many only have a spiritual shower once a week, often a little face wash which they let the pastor give them as they listen to his sermon! They don't even wash themselves!
We could not imagine going around dirty without washing our bodies, and yet we have no compunction about leaving our souls dirty. Just as we like to have a daily shower, it is even more important to daily wash the inward man. Often the inward man gets dirtier than the outward man. Each one of us faces daily challenges in life where we are tempted to be angry, bitter, hurt, upset, cantankerous, grouchy, complaining, proud and rebellious--and so the list goes on. Oh what a filthy inside! We really cannot survive without a daily bath of the inward man, can we? Otherwise our sins and the contaminations build up and we become a "bad smell" in our own home!
Do you remember the words that Jesus spoke to the Pharisees? "Cleanse FIRST that which is within the cup and platter, that the outside of them may be clean also." (Matthew 23:26) Read also Hebrews 10:22. The Word of God is the water that washes us. The word 'washing' in this Scripture is the Greek word, loutron (the verb is louo) and it means, "to take a bath, to wash the whole body and not just a part of it." It speaks metaphorically of washing every part of the inward man--our heart, soul, spirit, mind and emotions. It's a whole bath, not just a face wash. I find that if I do not personally read God's Word each day that sin can build up in my life and I am not even aware of it. But when I read the Word, the Holy Spirit reveals the things that grieve Him and which pollute my soul. I am convicted to repent and cast them from my life so I can keep my inward man clean. 2 Corinthians 7:1 says, "Having therefore these promises, dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God." I love the adage, "Sin will keep you from the Word of God, or the Word of God will keep you from sin." This is a good one to teach our children, isn't it? I grew up on this. As soon as your children can read well, encourage them to have a daily Quiet Time. Show them where to read and teach them how to hear the Holy Spirit speak to them as they read. Teach them that it is as important to wash their inward man each day as it is to wash their body. I remember reading about a dear Chinese Christian who confessed, "No Bible; no breakfast." He would never nourish his physical body until he had nourished his soul.
Perhaps you are young mom with lots of little children around you. How do you get time to read the Word? I know it is not easy. I remember when I had three children under 17 months, and then four children under four! Help! How could I find time to read the Word? I did it by putting my Bible on my windowsill, usually open to Psalms or Proverbs. I could look up from doing dishes and preparing vegetables to read a Scripture. You may like to have a Bible in the toilet or bathroom. Keep a Bible in the spot where you like to nurse your baby. Read a few Scriptures to your children at breakfast time and then again at your evening meal. Keep their souls as well as their bodies clean, too.
Which do you wash the most? Your physical body or your inward man?
Jesus said, "Now you are clean through the Word which I have spoken unto you." (John 15:3)
Love from NANCY CAMPBELL, Above Rubies
PRAYER:Wash me and take this mess as far as the east is from the west,Wash me and take this sin,Only You can make me pure again,I'm inviting you to come on in and Wash me!
AFFIRMATION:I'm smelling good, inside and out!
Ephesians 5:26, "Christ loved the church, and gave himself for it; that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the Word, that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish."
Back many years ago when folks did not have the plumbing in their homes that we enjoy today, most families took a bath once a week. Even when I was a child we bathed once a week, usually Saturday evening, to prepare for Sunday. But, we were challenged to have a Quiet Time every day where we read the Word of God to cleanse our inward lives.
Today, times have changed. Now that we have showers, everyone enjoys a shower every day to cleanse their bodies, but many only have a spiritual shower once a week, often a little face wash which they let the pastor give them as they listen to his sermon! They don't even wash themselves!
We could not imagine going around dirty without washing our bodies, and yet we have no compunction about leaving our souls dirty. Just as we like to have a daily shower, it is even more important to daily wash the inward man. Often the inward man gets dirtier than the outward man. Each one of us faces daily challenges in life where we are tempted to be angry, bitter, hurt, upset, cantankerous, grouchy, complaining, proud and rebellious--and so the list goes on. Oh what a filthy inside! We really cannot survive without a daily bath of the inward man, can we? Otherwise our sins and the contaminations build up and we become a "bad smell" in our own home!
Do you remember the words that Jesus spoke to the Pharisees? "Cleanse FIRST that which is within the cup and platter, that the outside of them may be clean also." (Matthew 23:26) Read also Hebrews 10:22. The Word of God is the water that washes us. The word 'washing' in this Scripture is the Greek word, loutron (the verb is louo) and it means, "to take a bath, to wash the whole body and not just a part of it." It speaks metaphorically of washing every part of the inward man--our heart, soul, spirit, mind and emotions. It's a whole bath, not just a face wash. I find that if I do not personally read God's Word each day that sin can build up in my life and I am not even aware of it. But when I read the Word, the Holy Spirit reveals the things that grieve Him and which pollute my soul. I am convicted to repent and cast them from my life so I can keep my inward man clean. 2 Corinthians 7:1 says, "Having therefore these promises, dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God." I love the adage, "Sin will keep you from the Word of God, or the Word of God will keep you from sin." This is a good one to teach our children, isn't it? I grew up on this. As soon as your children can read well, encourage them to have a daily Quiet Time. Show them where to read and teach them how to hear the Holy Spirit speak to them as they read. Teach them that it is as important to wash their inward man each day as it is to wash their body. I remember reading about a dear Chinese Christian who confessed, "No Bible; no breakfast." He would never nourish his physical body until he had nourished his soul.
Perhaps you are young mom with lots of little children around you. How do you get time to read the Word? I know it is not easy. I remember when I had three children under 17 months, and then four children under four! Help! How could I find time to read the Word? I did it by putting my Bible on my windowsill, usually open to Psalms or Proverbs. I could look up from doing dishes and preparing vegetables to read a Scripture. You may like to have a Bible in the toilet or bathroom. Keep a Bible in the spot where you like to nurse your baby. Read a few Scriptures to your children at breakfast time and then again at your evening meal. Keep their souls as well as their bodies clean, too.
Which do you wash the most? Your physical body or your inward man?
Jesus said, "Now you are clean through the Word which I have spoken unto you." (John 15:3)
Love from NANCY CAMPBELL, Above Rubies
PRAYER:Wash me and take this mess as far as the east is from the west,Wash me and take this sin,Only You can make me pure again,I'm inviting you to come on in and Wash me!
AFFIRMATION:I'm smelling good, inside and out!
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Kate's is 2!
Better Parent or Better Disciple?
by www.nourishingheartandhome.com
Having several small children (and a couple older) has really made me face some things in my life. There are a multitude of parenting books out there...many are very very good too...but I was finding that as I tried to "implement" whatever technique was in the latest parenting book I was reading with my kids, I still didn't see the fruit that I wanted to see. Oh, I might have seen some good fruit at first, but then we would fall back into bad habits, etc.
I think I am finally seeing something that the Lord has been trying to show me all along. While these parenting books are very good, they do not replace what I, as a parent, need to "be" in front of my kids. The student is only as good as his master. The Lord is showing me that I need to not worry about being a perfect parent, and focus on becoming a better follower of Christ. As I learn and grow and become more like Him, my children will follow as they seek after the same things. I am learning that in all my striving, I have been striving after the wind. I was trying to hold before my children an ideal that I myself was not living up to.
For example....
I hear my children yelling at each other...then remember how I have raised my voice in frustration with them.
I wish for my children to have a daily time in the Word...then I look at myself and see my lack of discipline in this area at times.
I desire for my children to have a servant heart...then I see how very selfish I have been at times.
I get frustrated when my children don't obey me...then I ask myself if I am obeying what the Lord is showing me.
I want my children to be more disciplined in certain areas...then I see that I lack discipline in some of the very same areas.
I try to teach my children patience...then I think of the times I have snapped at them in impatience.
I think you get the picture. I am not trying to say that there is not a place for aggressive and intentional parenting. But I think that I have been striving after the wrong thing. I have been after a "formula", an "answer" to all parenting problems, a "fix-all"...when what I really need to be striving after is becoming more like Him...a more faithful disciple...a more loving follower of Christ.
I look forward to the days ahead...because I know that He has all the answers! I am ever so anxious to follow hard after Him...to allow Him to grow me and change me into the woman He wants me to be...and in the process becoming the mother and wife that He wants me to be. As I reflect on this past year and look toward the new year, the Lord is making it clear to me where my focus should be...it should be on Him...on obeying Him...on spending time with Him...on becoming more like Him.Thank you, Lord, for your faithfulness...for your love...for your patience...for Your continued working in this imperfect vessel. I look forward to the new year and all You have in store for us.
Having several small children (and a couple older) has really made me face some things in my life. There are a multitude of parenting books out there...many are very very good too...but I was finding that as I tried to "implement" whatever technique was in the latest parenting book I was reading with my kids, I still didn't see the fruit that I wanted to see. Oh, I might have seen some good fruit at first, but then we would fall back into bad habits, etc.
I think I am finally seeing something that the Lord has been trying to show me all along. While these parenting books are very good, they do not replace what I, as a parent, need to "be" in front of my kids. The student is only as good as his master. The Lord is showing me that I need to not worry about being a perfect parent, and focus on becoming a better follower of Christ. As I learn and grow and become more like Him, my children will follow as they seek after the same things. I am learning that in all my striving, I have been striving after the wind. I was trying to hold before my children an ideal that I myself was not living up to.
For example....
I hear my children yelling at each other...then remember how I have raised my voice in frustration with them.
I wish for my children to have a daily time in the Word...then I look at myself and see my lack of discipline in this area at times.
I desire for my children to have a servant heart...then I see how very selfish I have been at times.
I get frustrated when my children don't obey me...then I ask myself if I am obeying what the Lord is showing me.
I want my children to be more disciplined in certain areas...then I see that I lack discipline in some of the very same areas.
I try to teach my children patience...then I think of the times I have snapped at them in impatience.
I think you get the picture. I am not trying to say that there is not a place for aggressive and intentional parenting. But I think that I have been striving after the wrong thing. I have been after a "formula", an "answer" to all parenting problems, a "fix-all"...when what I really need to be striving after is becoming more like Him...a more faithful disciple...a more loving follower of Christ.
I look forward to the days ahead...because I know that He has all the answers! I am ever so anxious to follow hard after Him...to allow Him to grow me and change me into the woman He wants me to be...and in the process becoming the mother and wife that He wants me to be. As I reflect on this past year and look toward the new year, the Lord is making it clear to me where my focus should be...it should be on Him...on obeying Him...on spending time with Him...on becoming more like Him.Thank you, Lord, for your faithfulness...for your love...for your patience...for Your continued working in this imperfect vessel. I look forward to the new year and all You have in store for us.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Davis Update
I guess it's time for an update from the Davis clan. Everyone is doing well, chugging along with daily life, homeschooling, and work.
I am implementing some new ways of accomplishing our daily homeschooling to make things easier on myself. The kids are actually responding well and seem to like this format better. I'll share later what changes in curriculum and structure we are making. We are also working on reorganizing our home and making better use of space. We have moved many toys and the boys legos, etc upstairs to our loft room. The access is not ideal (a ladder) but it works great for getting all the stuff out of their room and making less clutter.
Baby #5 is growing radiply and getting very active. The kids love to put their heads on my belly and wait for the bump. They love to pretend that he/she is in there saying, "Hey you, move over, your crowding my space!" Kate is in love with her "baby" in Mommy's tummy. I have found that making a big deal about the new baby being the 2yo's "baby" makes the adjustment easier when the baby gets here. Not as much jealosy when they see ownership in this new little person, not someone stealing their attention.
We are busy each week with 2 homeschool co-ops, basketball practices and games for Cody, Cub Scouts for both boys, and various church activities.
We recently celebrated our 11th anniversary followed soon after by Kate's 2nd birthday. I have lots of pics to post of Christmas, Kate's b-day, basketball, and lots of other stuff when i find time to get to it???
I am implementing some new ways of accomplishing our daily homeschooling to make things easier on myself. The kids are actually responding well and seem to like this format better. I'll share later what changes in curriculum and structure we are making. We are also working on reorganizing our home and making better use of space. We have moved many toys and the boys legos, etc upstairs to our loft room. The access is not ideal (a ladder) but it works great for getting all the stuff out of their room and making less clutter.
Baby #5 is growing radiply and getting very active. The kids love to put their heads on my belly and wait for the bump. They love to pretend that he/she is in there saying, "Hey you, move over, your crowding my space!" Kate is in love with her "baby" in Mommy's tummy. I have found that making a big deal about the new baby being the 2yo's "baby" makes the adjustment easier when the baby gets here. Not as much jealosy when they see ownership in this new little person, not someone stealing their attention.
We are busy each week with 2 homeschool co-ops, basketball practices and games for Cody, Cub Scouts for both boys, and various church activities.
We recently celebrated our 11th anniversary followed soon after by Kate's 2nd birthday. I have lots of pics to post of Christmas, Kate's b-day, basketball, and lots of other stuff when i find time to get to it???
The Easy Way
By Nancy Campbell, Above Rubies
Isaiah 44:20, "A deceived heart has turned him aside."
Have you read the story of Pilgrim's Progress? If so, do you remember when Christian was tempted to turn into Bypath Meadow? Faithful and Christian were weary and the King's Way was rough and stony. They were tired and their feet ached. They came to a stile where the fence divided the King's Way from Bypath Meadow. Bypath Meadow was a smooth, grassy path instead of the rough stony one--but best of all; it ran right alongside the Way of the King. They wouldn't be going in the wrong direction. They really wouldn't be turning away and they would be able to jump back over the fence if it veered in the wrong direction.They turned aside to the easy path. But eventually a storm came and flooded the path, darkness came and they could not find the way back to the King's Way. They fell asleep and were seized by Giant Despair and his cruel wife, Diffidence. They were cruelly beaten and imprisoned for some time until God provided a way to escape.
This is how the enemy tempts us too. We would never veer right away from the Lord. Of course we want to obey and follow Him. But we are often tempted to take the easy path. We are tired of the sacrifice, heartaches and sleepless nights. We are tired of taking up our cross. We want it easy. We want everything to go our own way.
"Have another child? Help! Too much work. I want to take it easy. I want some rest." But does it really make life easier? More children results in more blessings, more entertainment in the home, more diversity, more built-in helpers and built-in friends.
"Do I really have to stop eating all that sugar and all those carbs? I love them. They're my comfort food." They may be the desirable way, but not in the end!
"I'm overwhelmed with all this homeschooling. I can't take it any longer. I'm sending them back to public school." Sure, it's the easier way. But what about the ungodly influence on your children? What about the subtle humanist brainwashing? What about the ungodly friends they may make? How will it affect their destiny?
The easy path takes us further and further away from the truth. If we take the easy way in our family, we'll begin to take the easy way in other areas too. We'll begin to rely on government, rather than being a free people and taking responsibility for ourselves. We'll become weak and no longer people of strength of character. And the long term result is bondage to dictatorship.
I was talking to a friend about a couple who are having marriage problems. "It's no use her going back to him until her heart wants to go back," my friend commented. "Oh no," I replied. "If she waits for her heart, she may never return!
"What does the Bible say in Jeremiah 17:9? "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?"
Our heart can so easily deceive us. We don't stay in a marriage because our heart is happy and wanting to stay. We stay in a marriage, or go back to a marriage if we have left it, because it is the right thing to do--because of obedience and commitment. No wonder there is so much divorce today. Everyone wants to take Bypath Meadow. They want the easy way out. Their focus is on looking after themselves. Everything revolves around self. "Poor me. He's not meeting my needs. He doesn't understand me." The excuses keep coming. But Marriage is not all about "me." Marriage is forgetting about myself and concentrating on how I can serve my husband and family. It's commitment to my vows. It's not giving in to deceptive feelings but sticking to the vision of building a godly generation. It continues in the face of hardship and frustration.
Marriage is more than two people. Marriage affects our children. It affects the extended family. It affects the church and everyone around us. It affects the generations to come--and eternity. When we turn aside to the easy path, we enter into deviation, delusion and deception. It is only when we get back on the King's Highway of truth that we will be safe, even though we may face challenges and difficulties.
Don't be deceived by the easy path.
Love from NANCY CAMPBELL, ABOVE RUBIES
PRAYER:"Oh God please save me from being deceived. Save me from taking the easy path that looks good, but is not your way. Give me discernment to recognize the bypaths. Amen."
AFFIRMATION:I will not be deceived by the allurements of the easy way.
Isaiah 44:20, "A deceived heart has turned him aside."
Have you read the story of Pilgrim's Progress? If so, do you remember when Christian was tempted to turn into Bypath Meadow? Faithful and Christian were weary and the King's Way was rough and stony. They were tired and their feet ached. They came to a stile where the fence divided the King's Way from Bypath Meadow. Bypath Meadow was a smooth, grassy path instead of the rough stony one--but best of all; it ran right alongside the Way of the King. They wouldn't be going in the wrong direction. They really wouldn't be turning away and they would be able to jump back over the fence if it veered in the wrong direction.They turned aside to the easy path. But eventually a storm came and flooded the path, darkness came and they could not find the way back to the King's Way. They fell asleep and were seized by Giant Despair and his cruel wife, Diffidence. They were cruelly beaten and imprisoned for some time until God provided a way to escape.
This is how the enemy tempts us too. We would never veer right away from the Lord. Of course we want to obey and follow Him. But we are often tempted to take the easy path. We are tired of the sacrifice, heartaches and sleepless nights. We are tired of taking up our cross. We want it easy. We want everything to go our own way.
"Have another child? Help! Too much work. I want to take it easy. I want some rest." But does it really make life easier? More children results in more blessings, more entertainment in the home, more diversity, more built-in helpers and built-in friends.
"Do I really have to stop eating all that sugar and all those carbs? I love them. They're my comfort food." They may be the desirable way, but not in the end!
"I'm overwhelmed with all this homeschooling. I can't take it any longer. I'm sending them back to public school." Sure, it's the easier way. But what about the ungodly influence on your children? What about the subtle humanist brainwashing? What about the ungodly friends they may make? How will it affect their destiny?
The easy path takes us further and further away from the truth. If we take the easy way in our family, we'll begin to take the easy way in other areas too. We'll begin to rely on government, rather than being a free people and taking responsibility for ourselves. We'll become weak and no longer people of strength of character. And the long term result is bondage to dictatorship.
I was talking to a friend about a couple who are having marriage problems. "It's no use her going back to him until her heart wants to go back," my friend commented. "Oh no," I replied. "If she waits for her heart, she may never return!
"What does the Bible say in Jeremiah 17:9? "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?"
Our heart can so easily deceive us. We don't stay in a marriage because our heart is happy and wanting to stay. We stay in a marriage, or go back to a marriage if we have left it, because it is the right thing to do--because of obedience and commitment. No wonder there is so much divorce today. Everyone wants to take Bypath Meadow. They want the easy way out. Their focus is on looking after themselves. Everything revolves around self. "Poor me. He's not meeting my needs. He doesn't understand me." The excuses keep coming. But Marriage is not all about "me." Marriage is forgetting about myself and concentrating on how I can serve my husband and family. It's commitment to my vows. It's not giving in to deceptive feelings but sticking to the vision of building a godly generation. It continues in the face of hardship and frustration.
Marriage is more than two people. Marriage affects our children. It affects the extended family. It affects the church and everyone around us. It affects the generations to come--and eternity. When we turn aside to the easy path, we enter into deviation, delusion and deception. It is only when we get back on the King's Highway of truth that we will be safe, even though we may face challenges and difficulties.
Don't be deceived by the easy path.
Love from NANCY CAMPBELL, ABOVE RUBIES
PRAYER:"Oh God please save me from being deceived. Save me from taking the easy path that looks good, but is not your way. Give me discernment to recognize the bypaths. Amen."
AFFIRMATION:I will not be deceived by the allurements of the easy way.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Target Clearance-Christmas Dresses
Target has lots of clearance sales going right now to make room for the new stuff. One specific item we saw today (Bryan Target) was girls Christmas dresses marked down to $4.98. They had probably around 50 dresses still, mostly in red, but also some green plaid, red plaid and gold. All were very pretty and dressy. So, if you are looking for dresses for next year, now's the time to buy.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Gymboree Semi-Annual Sale
Gymboree is having their big semi-annual sale right now. I think it may be almost done though. I am hoping to run up there today and see what deals i can find!
Happy Bargain Searching!
Happy Bargain Searching!
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